So Complicated!

Recently I have been in a complicated relationship, and this past weekend we have gotten so close and I realized that I have fallen for this person. Only to be terrified of getting hurt by this individual. I have spent lots of time pondering the situation and still cannot come to a conclusion about our relationship. Should I just end it and get over it? Should I just stick with it and see what becomes of it? If I end it then i will be wondering what could have become of this relationship for the rest of my life, but on the other hand if I stick with it for now, someone could get hurt.

I don't usually think about things so much, but when you realize how much you care about a person after such a short period of time; what should be done? Whatever decision I make I know that it will just be the beginning of a intricate web that I am weaving.

I just have to decide what i really want and run the risk of regret and or heartbreak!

Perfect Disaster

Have you ever felt like everything seems so right but so wrong at the same time?

In my life when everything seems to be going just right a moment later things come crashing down and complicate matters to the point where I would love to give up. But to give up means that I don't want to work on the situation and make it better. But all my life I have been taught to work on my problems and make the best of what I've got.

Should I give up? Should I try something new or different? Should I just settle for something less? But why should I be the one to settle for something less? Why should I give up something that I want? Why should I give up something that is different?

No one really knows the answer, we are all just wandering around tyring to figure it out. Some settle for less, some think they've got it all, some live a lie, and some never find what they were really looking for. I'm on a crazy roller coaster that won't slow down. It's like a love story with the ending torn out.

How come what I have is never good enough?

I have spread my wings to fly to only see that I keep falling into disappointment. I have almost everything that I could ever need or want. But I just feel that there's gotta be something more.

Hopefully there's something more!


I've got it all, but I feel so deprived
I go up, I come down and I'm emptier inside
Tell me what is this thing that I feel like I'm missing
And why can't I let it go

There's gotta be more to life...
Than chasing down every temporary high to satisfy me
Cause the more that I'm...
Trippin' out thinkin' there must be more to life
Well it's life, but I'm sure... There's gotta be more

(Than wanting more)

I've got the time and I'm wasting it slowly
Here in this moment I'm half-way out the door
Onto the next thing, I'm searching for something that's missing

I'm wanting more

I'm always waiting on something other than this
Why am I feelin' like there's something I missed....
Always... Always...

More to life
There's gotta be more to life (more to life)
There's gotta be more to life (more)
More to my life

-More to Life By Stacie Orrico